Moms - here's to you

Mother’s Day is fast approaching.  I’ve decided I don’t care for this holiday much.  As an official mom, I’m allowed to say that and not receive condemning glares from others.  I dislike the holiday for the simple fact that, instead of making mothers feel fabulous and exalted, for many of us it just makes us feel overwhelmed and guilty. 

            Commerical Mother’s Day is all about that mom who wipes away every tear and kisses every boo-boo.  Even Mother’s Day from a Christian perspective is all about the “saintliness” of moms.  Do not misunderstand me – my mom is a precious gift from God.  She’s an incredible woman.  But looking at Mother’s Day, now from a mother’s perspective, has changed my tune about the whole holiday.  How many times do we, as mothers, look around on Mother's Day at these picture-perfect woman and think, "That's not me" or "I'm glad they don't live with me"?  We feel bad because we realize our imperfections on our ultimate, unattainable quest for perfect lives and families and children.

            Here’s my tribute to Mother’s Day:

            Here’s to the stepmoms, foster moms, and adoptive moms – who sometimes go unrecognized in the wake of biological mothers.  The moms who have to sound excited as your child tells you all about the gift they made for “mommy.”  The moms who love and hurt and press on because it’s all about that child.  The moms who bite their tongues and force smiles because that little set of eyes is watching how you handle “mommy”.  The moms who struggle to find and make their place in little lives. 

            Here’s to the moms who hide in the bathroom, eating cupcakes because they just need 10 minutes of “me” time.  Here’s to the moms who let their kids go to bed crying because they’re acting like spoiled brats and you can’t have that kind of behavior in this house.  Here’s to the moms who throw lunchables in lunch bags because really, who has the time to create healthy, organic lunches EVERY day.  Here’s to the moms who know their child well enough to know if it deserves a snuggle and babying or a good dose of tough love and “You’ll be okay”. 

            Here’s to the moms who cry because they’re overwhelmed, or confused, or just trying to make some semblance of order of this life and hope that you don’t screw them up too badly.  Here’s to the moms who aren’t afraid to hit their knees and cry out that they aren’t good enough, that they can’t do enough to ever meet the standards that they placed upon themselves.  Here’s to the moms who miss showers, leave a load of clothes in the washer until they’re rank, have sinks piled high with dirty dishes.  Here’s to the moms who crave bedtime and force their children to sleep in their own beds, because even in love something has to be your own.    

            Here’s to the moms everywhere who don’t think that they are “Supermom”.  Here’s to every time you fall and fly and fail and pray for grace to get back up again.  Here's to the moms who want to scream and cry and hug their child all at once.  Here's to unending, unquestionable, unnerving love that makes you pull your hair and wipe boogers and go to bed exhausted.  Here’s to imperfection and persistence and fresh mercies each morning.  Here’s to believing that God has called you to this role and that He will make you into exactly the mother that your child needs.    

            Imperfect, beautiful, messy mothers – here’s to you.  Happy Mother’s Day.